Excuses.

My dog ate my Ambien.

I once emailed that to my boss to call off work because, $275 and a paradoxically hyper dog later, it was a true story. Truthfully, I am a bad, bad liar. Apparently when you stop having homework to eat, your dogs start dining on your sleeping pills.

Dino and I created a blog in 2000-something or another as a way for long-time friends to avoid becoming erstwhile in different cities (if you don’t know what that erstwhile word means, I suggest m-w.com over free dictionary). We never knew people would actually like our blog. We had regular readers like OldWiseOne and Biggayneil (who I always wanted to actually meet) …and then there was the usual “Buy Levitra.” Levitra is either the best or worst stripper name…I can’t decide.

Anyway, our hot asses went into some kind of la belle au bois dormant writing moment circa 2007 and hiiiiiiii, we're now awake again. Don’t worry Biggayneil, he didn’t kiss me to wake me up. It’s definitely not our thing.

Excuses = Reasons.

They can…excuses really can be real reasons and not simply using some poor mosquito as a cover for that giant zit on your face. In our heyday (I’ve always wanted to say that – “In my heyday..”), we wrote about celebrity gossip with a bit o’ pop culture, a splash of music and a lime. Guess what? That kills your soul. Honestly, there’s only so much anyone can say about Lindsay Lohan before you feel like you’re a record that is relentlessly skipping on the worst song known to mankind (we can discuss the contenders of this song division at a later date). Also, I’m sure this is exactly how she feels on a daily basis. When things stop being positively fulfilling, stop those things. So, we’ve grown up, moved on and still managed to not let our interesting perspectives of this world be vacuumed out of us by the most popular blanket excuse for everything (read this with a sighing voice) "...the economy." We will be now be writing about our how we view this crazy little world (sans gossip) whether you like it or not. Celebhijinx is now Double Hijinx…which is what it always should have been. Who needs celebrity gossip when you have xine and dino in real life?

I’m reposting the last blog I wrote in 2007:

I've been treating the blog like that credit card bill you don't want to open because you spent too much money last month and you're pretty sure it's overdue so if you leave it alone, it might just go away. I know I haven't been posting a lot and I thought that maybe if I just stayed away, nobody would notice and then I could just come back when my life is less busy and pick up where I left off. After receiving angry phone calls and emails about how everyone is bored at work, I realize that much like avoiding credit card bills, ignoring the blog is a very bad idea.

When I wrote that I immediately felt like I was insulting the blog readers by making up a bad credit card analogy. As I read it now, I realize I was just talking about how it was time to take a break. So, we’re back. And yes, the Korean Air commercial (click on that to get to the commercial- we're still working out the kinky layout business) I randomly uploaded to my last blog is still my favorite commercial. I just cannot get over Korean Air's obscure approach to advertising that instantly makes me want to jump on a plane to Korea where I will be showered with champagne (poolside?), perfume and sexy blue shoes by some strangely-moving yet totally adorable Korean girl with a really, really sleek updo.